Tag: public speaking

4 Ways to Stop Imposter Syndrome in Public Speaking

Emily Schwartz Speaks

When people contact me for public speaking coaching, I’ve noticed that before we get to things like perfecting the craft of storytelling, refining a message, vocal qualities etc, I often need to convince the person they deserve the speaking platform they were given in the first place. This happens….a lot. From the most expert-y experts you can imagine.

If you know even a little about me, you know I’m not one to tell someone to “change their mindset” without giving CONCRETE, ACTIONABLE TO-DOs to make that happen. (My brain didn’t come with a “mindset” switch. Did yours?)

So here they are. Here are four things you can DO – as in, add to a to-do list and then check off – that will help you overcome your imposter syndrome and CREATE a confident mindset before your next speaking event.

1. Update Your Resume

I don’t mean run it through an AI to optimize your keywords. I mean BRAG. In whatever bullet point format you choose. Write down everything you’ve done –  every accomplishment, every metric, every award, every EVERYTHING you can think of.  

Did you do that? Ok, now read it. Read it over multiple times. You were asked to speak BECAUSE of this document not in spite of it. Bring that voice with you.

2. Define What an Expert Is

Clients will often tell me they think “everyone knows more than they do.” Alright fine. Let’s go with that for a moment. Define what an “expert” means to you. What qualities, certifications, knowledge, career benchmarks etc would you need to have that would let you consider yourself an “expert?” I’m serious, write it down. This isn’t an “in your head” exercise.

Now, look at what you wrote. Would that list have been different 10 years ago? 20 years ago? Think of your PAST SELF writing this list, how that list would be different, and how many of those qualities you NOW HAVE. There is always more to accomplish. Imposter syndrome makes us focus on what we haven’t done, rather than what we have. When you speak, you’re speaking from the WEALTH OF KNOWLEDGE that you’ve accumulated, not what you’ve yet to do.  

3. Do Some “And-So-If-Then” For Your Worst-Case Scenario.

Think of the worst-case scenario you’re worried about in your speaking. The most common imposter-syndrome related concern I hear is, “I’m afraid I’ll be asked a question I don’t know,” so let’s use that as the example.

“I’m afraid I’ll be asked a question I don’t know.”

…AND?

“And then I’ll feel stupid.”

“SO, IF I don’t know the answer to every question, THEN I’m stupid?”

Well, hmm, when you put it that way, it sounds silly!

Folks, there are SO many things to know. Our world is PACKED with information. Nobody knows everything about everything. Zero people. In fact, the more of an expert someone is, the more they KNOW they don’t know everything.  It’s not a matter of IF you’ll be asked a question you don’t know, it’s WHEN, so use that energy to work on what you’ll say when you’re faced with that situation, not HOPING it never happens.

(BTW, my go to phrases are: “Huh! Well isn’t THAT a fantastic question! I’m going to have to chew on that and get back to you” OR, if it’s something super basic that has simply slipped my mind –  “Wow, I really feel like I should know that one. Computer must be having some data retrieval issues.”  Find a phrase that sounds like YOU and practice it.)

4. Learn Something New

Confidence defeats imposter syndrome, and learning new things makes us feel confident. Best way to always be learning? BE CURIOUS!

What’s the topic/subject/thing you’re feeling weird about? Go read a book about it! Go watch a video. Go read a blog. Just make sure it comes from a place of CURIOSITY, not FOMO. “Fear Of Missing Out” knowledge consumption comes from fear. It comes from a place of trying to learn everything about everything which is a goal you’ll never achieve. Curiosity comes from a place of strength. Experts are always curious to learn more. Not as a benchmark to reach, but as a habit to live.

Go learn something. Anything. It can be related to your subject, but it doesn’t have to be. Learning makes us confident, and confident people can bring their best to their speaking.

Going forward

Finally, people who have worked with me know that if it doesn’t fit on a Post-it Note, I’m not all about it. So, here is your To-Do Post-it. Go on. Take it.

And go own the room at your next speaking engagement because you earned it.

Want more speaking tips? Check out my book Speak with Confidence on Amazon.

Want one-on-one help for an upcoming speaking engagement? Learn more about what coaching entails, and reach out today EmilySchwartzSpeaks@gmail.com

How to Speak Like a Leader

Emily Schwartz Speaks

Why do some leaders seem to have the natural ability to inspire change through their communications?  Why do some leaders engage an audience the second they open their mouths, and some are so…forgettable and unremarkable? Speaking like a leader is both an art and a science. Before you speak to your team again, try these things:

Make it About Them

As a speaker, the focus is on the audience, not you. Your job is to inspire THEM, to help THEM elevate their actions and ideas, to address THEIR problems and fears. As you’re putting together your talk, pause after each new thought and ask yourself, “Why should this matter to them? Why should they care? How will this help?” If the answer to those questions is not abundantly and obviously clear – make it so.

When your biggest worry as a speaker is, “I’m afraid my message won’t reach the audience” and not “I’m afraid I’ll mess up, say the wrong words, look silly, fidget too much, say too many ums” etc, THAT is when you know you’ve reached leadership territory.

Say Less

If you say 100 things once, people will remember nothing. If you say one thing 100 times, your message will stick. What is the BIG idea you want people to remember? What is the BIG thing, the concrete action, the measurable step you want your group to take? Decide what that is and say it repeatedly. “Simplify” is not a dirty word. It’s actually the smartest and quickest way to elevate your communication.

Treat it Like a Performance

Think of a leader you admire. Does it feel like they come across as effortlessly impactful? It takes a lot of effort to appear “effortless.” Leadership isn’t about winging it. Before you speak to the group, plan out the message you want to convey. Practice it so you can deliver it confidently. Speak louder than you normally would and make a conscious effort to add vocal variety to your speech so you don’t come across as monotone.

I’ve never understood why coaches tell speakers to “act natural.” I don’t naturally stumble into a room of 40 people and communicate an important message. You want to be your genuine self, but the speaking version of that genuine self. That person appears confident, relaxed, inspired, and engaging.

Leaders report that their teams’ communication skills improve dramatically after a public speaking training. Reach out and schedule yours today. EmilySchwartzSpeaks@gmail.com